Gotta love how some people think.

James Taranto is great with news stories that aren't always phrased the best way.

If You Must Do It, Do It Right
The Associated Press brings us this curious report from Hackensack, N.J.:

A Bergen County grand jury has handed down a 20-count indictment against an area gym teacher, accused of sexually assaulting nine underage girls.

Jose Cruz, 44, was indicted Friday on charges that he improperly fondled the girls on various occasions between January and March.

Is there a proper way for a teacher to fondle underage girls?